Hard is what you'd call it. When one turns into two turns into five. Somewhere along the line it slips away from you. You feel good, feel great, feel too great, feel bad. Then you wake up and remember and feel worse.
It's not the slipping I mind. It's not the involuntary letting go, the total lack of control. It's the shaking hand, the uneasy mind. The glass you have to pour just to even out. Then you feel normal. Then you feel like yourself. Even though you're not sure who you are anymore.
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